Self-Date! by Shweta Nagpurkar Saxena

Shweta Nagpurkar Saxena,

CORPORATE PSYCHOLOGIST & WRITER

www.insurancerate.com StarBuzz Weekly, Toronto-People, it is high time that we stop grumbling about our partners and their, either justified or unjustified, inability to spend time with us. Why not just stop going back to ‘that’ date on the calendar when we dated with our special one? Why not stop all the time anticipating when can we plan the next date to once again cheer-up our souls?

Have we taken a short break and cared to realize that there were times when even planning weekends was so much fun? Exchanging calls, emails, discussing and planning the next holiday destination or some innovative dating idea was so de-stressing. Wednesdays were real gear-up days for fantasizing on how would the coming date be? What to wear? How to look special? What to gift? And so on…..

Please do not give that ‘Alas’ look because it is just the right time for us to realize that we do have one more love relationship in life. And that is with our own self!

Why worry about the repeat dates or finding fresh dates and their availability for us? Instead, let us try this:

 1] Who knows and understands your emotional needs the best? Who would better know that from where have your needs stimulated? The reasons behind them? Right and the acceptable ways to fulfill them? Yes, it is You!!

2] Many emotional in-completions of life start and end on us. However, we keep ourselves very busy in doing this externally.  We miss on taking a break and introspecting that, “Hey, wait a sec, I too can have an answer for this…..”

3] Self-date is more like a self-celebration. It is a sort of event which you have to plan/ manage for yourself and enjoy it as much as you can. You need to actually sit down with your notebook, think of what really makes you happy? Activity? Place? Art gallery? Movie? Shopping? Sea beaches? Pick any one, decide the weekend day, time and go on with the plan. Make sure that you choose the time which pushes you into more loneliness, may be evening hours or couple of hours after you wake-up. This is the right time to do some fun and cheer-up yourself.

4] Understand and accept the need of this ‘Me Time’. Try not to get busy with the calls/ emails in this time. More the distractions, more disappointment it will lead to. Thus, regulate these ways and not disappoint yourself.

5] Let the ‘pressure of performance’ stay away. This isn’t some business or office work; so, let not this date give you any stress. Even if you return back home early than expected, it is fine. What remains important is ‘you’ did it.